Sunday, August 31, 2008

Rob's two

Two exes on the calendar.

Two colorful, construction-paper chain links clipped away.

Only 33 more until we see him again.

The kids and I are doing okay.

Lily asked on the way home from the airport, "Is Daddy going to church with us tomorrow?" "No, honey, Daddy will be in Navy school." "What?!" she exclaimed incredulously. She asked if we could go back to the airport tomorrow and pick him up. She keeps asking for confirmation that we are going to go see him on Seth's birthday, which we are. Over and over she asks. I gently reassure her over and over.

Seth said, "I miss my daddy. He's my favorite kind of daddy." I'm with ya, buddy. Then after church this morning, my mom picked him up from his class. Rob usually does this. Seth asked her, "Where's my dad?" She told him, "He's in Navy school." He didn't say anything, but just looked straight ahead, suddenly remembering.

Caleb said, as we watched Rob's red and gray plane fly off into the blue, "This is the worst day of my life." He posted to his blog: "Today my dad left to Rhode Island for Navy training. I feel a little down, but I'm glad he's going into the Navy, because the Lord Jesus told us to go." Rob's obedience is having a tremendous impact on our children.

Gabriel posted to his blog today. His post is titled "When Dad Left" and it reads simply this: "Dad left. It was hard. I was sad." He's mostly quiet and introspective about his thoughts, but on the page he expressed himself clearly and effectively, nearly breaking my heart.

We miss him. I still sleep on my side of the bed and reach over for him in the fogginess of early morning. Then I suddenly remember, too. 33 more days.

When Rob got to the Newport naval station, he checked in, got his orders signed, and was then told that he is on leave until Monday night because of the holiday weekend. His lucky roommate only lives an hour from the base, so he checked in, and then he went home to spend the weekend with his wife and child. I am happy for the leave time, because at least Rob can call me when he wants to. Here are a couple tidbits from his new experience: the food is not good, he is surrounded by water and noisy seagulls, the dark of evening comes a lot earlier in RI than MI, and he can't seem to find a coffee maker anywhere on base. God have mercy! He's got another whole day of nothing...and then he's going to be thrown into the deep end.

I'm doing better. I'm down to needing pain meds only a couple of times a day. For me the worst part is how easily wiped out I get. I hate the blah feeling of exhaustion with nothing to show for it. I have a post-op doctor's visit this Friday. I can then talk to my surgeon in length about my surgery and the cyst.

Thanks again to everyone for their thoughts and prayers. We're still prayer needy...

Friday, August 22, 2008

Wanna see? ***Warning: Graphic Medical Photo

I'm still recovering. Feeling a little better sometimes, a little worse others.

You know, healing pains.

Did I tell you that I sent my camera into the operating room with one of my nurses? She took some pictures of the mega-cyst they removed from my midsection.

I was curious. Maybe you are, too?

Can you believe this thing?

I was seriously wondering why my pants kept getting tighter. I think I figured it out.

What do you think?

Thursday, August 21, 2008


Hi. I'm home. Very glad to be home.

My mom drove up from MO to stay with me for as long as I need her. I'm so thankful. Boy, do we need her.

Rob and the kids are taking great and gentle care of me.

I'm laying in bed right now with my sister-in-law's laptop propped up on a pillow. Ah, I feel connected after three days of hospital isolation.

All is going well. Wow, I'm really sore. But God is so faithful.

I'm off to rest...

P.S. Thanks to all my faithful pray-ers out there!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Today's the day

Okay, so I'm showered. I have several books stuffed into my purse. I have toothpaste. I'm not able to enjoy a cup of coffee because of the pre-surgery fast, but I can at least smell it. I'm doing some last-minute laundry. I think I'm ready.

I'm ready for it to be over.

My sister is coming over today to watch the kids while Rob takes me to the hospital.

My mom is coming over Wednesday before I even get home to stay for as long as we need her.

I'm holding tightly like a little child to my Father's big, warm hand. He's very near.

I'm feeling a little blue that I'm going to the hospital and I don't get to come home with a baby. (What am I, nuts?! Maybe a little...)

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

On the Calendar

I have a surgery date: Tuesday, the 19th at 2:00 p.m. I'm really nervous about it now, more nervous than I ever was giving birth. That was natural. This is not.

I am, however, thankful for the gift of medicine and technology that God has given to talented individuals. I'm thankful for insurance coverage. I'm thankful that my family is stepping up to help in whatever way they can. I'm thankful for Rob's support and kinds words of encouragement that keep me light-hearted.

God is very good.

I'm really feeling sad about Rob 17 days.

The Good, the Bad, the really Ugly

The Good: The OB surgeon is AWESOME. I love her. I just accepted whatever referral my family doctor gave me, 'cuz we're in a bit of a time crunch here. And if I were given a hundred smiling, scalpel-wielding OB's, she is the one I would have picked. Also, she is going to do whatever she can do to get my surgery done before Rob leaves. Thank-you, God!

The Bad: Okay, I'm going to be cut open from above my navel, around my navel, and then down below my navel. Rob's getting ready to leave for Naval training, but I'm the one who stuck with navel warfare. (Get it? Navel? Naval? Oh, never mind.) Anyway, it's a huge surgery. Three days in the hospital. Three weeks of no driving, little or no stairs--good thing I live in a ranch house--no laundry, no standing and cooking for any significant length of time, significant pain, and lots of bedrest. Six weeks of no lifting or vacuuming. Help.

The Ugly: 17 cm X 13 cm X 9 cm. Yeah, that's how big this growth is. No wonder my pants are tight despite aggressive dieting! (Okay, aggressive is relative.)

I'm expecting a phone call this afternoon or tomorrow telling me when my surgery is going to be. I'm collecting reading material now. And getting caught up on laundry. And planning some serious freezer-meal cooking.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Another appointment

1. Blood tests for cancer: normal.
2. Swab test: normal.
3. Ultra-sound: looks like a cyst.
4. CT Scan: still looks like a cyst, but with the addition of some solid parts that look a little ominous. Yet, see number one and number two above, so don't be too worried.

Next step: Another appointment on Wednesday with a surgeon/specialist.

Still praying to get this taken care of before Rob leaves for Rhode Island.

In 19 days.

Keep posted...

My Weekend: In Photos And Captions

My baby is 9/Nine/Nueve/Neuf...growing too fast!

Celebrating Caleb's birthday at the playground with friends.

"Oh, no! Rain clouds up ahead!" This time she was right!

Jeremy and Caleb: best buds.

Wonderful commissioning service for Rob at church, with Lt. Carmichael.

Just gotta slide.

Movie-star smile.

My Lily. Forever.

Skater....with blankie.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Horse Show!

I'm so proud of my little cowboys. They did so well! Suzie, too. There were some beautiful animals there at the fair, but I gotta tell, Suzie was still the most spectacular looking to me. She is just a gem. The day after the fair we drove her out to my brother's, who is graciously boarding her for us until we get settled in TX and can get her down there.

Caleb was asked: What are you most excited about moving to Texas?
His response: Getting Suzie back.

Ditto, buddy.

Caleb doing showmanship.

Gabe so adorably waiting for his turn.

Gabe doing showmanship.

Caleb showing in the "lead line" class and blowing his mama a kiss as he passed by in the show ring. Please don't let him outgrow that, Lord!


Two cute!


A quick update on me:

I've had blood drawn, and I underwent an ultrasound and just yesterday a CT scan. They think it's a cyst, but I'm still waiting for the CT scan results to come back to confirm that's all it is. I have a consultation with my doctor on Friday, probably just to refer me to a specialist.

Now, you know as much as me! They don't like to give you too much information. Maybe they're afraid you'll explode.


And I feel fine.